Climate change..

From google

Some 54 years ago my family moved to Pahang when my father joined Felda settlement,I was just 6 years old. I remembered the first day we arrived at our house. It was surrounded by bushes and the weeds pricked through the wooden floor gaps of the small residence provided by the Felda. It was the modest house that we called home for many many years later.

There were so many childhood memories.. Some happy moments.. Some sad heart breakings at that time. However because of our movement to Pahang I managed to finish school and even graduated with my first degree with the money my father earned working in 10 hecters oil palm plantation. 

I remember the house was so cold surrounded by  palm oil trees. I slept soundly everynight even without fan as there was no electricity. My mother used to acommpany me studying at night with the oil lamp next to me. I stayed out late as I was sitting for my STPM. I passed with flying colors and entered UKM.

In the morning, my mother used to make roti canai for breakfast. She had to put the oil bottle next to the wood fire to melt the oil as at night which was so cold, it turned solid. My father used to sit at the table with the radio on listening to  nasyid songs as the dawn break. So many memories making me melancholic. 

Nowadays, after some 50 years the climate has changed drastically. Even now I was sitting in my room waiting for the dusk prayer, with the aircond turned on fully blast.. It was still warm. There was no rains within this 3 weeks and even there was rain once, it did not take away the heat. 

How I missed the house I was brought up in Pahang.. And how I missed the morning routine with my mom cooking breakfast and my dad listening to radio.. And how I missed the old good times.. 

Al Fatihah to all my loved ones.. My mom. My dad, my sister.. 

Wut

My new vision..

 A month ago I had my cataract surgery on my left eye. A year before I had this double vision problem so the surgery had to be postponed until my vision improved and the problem solved.

My eyes are better now even though not 100 percent clear vision. Of course it will not be as clear as vision of young person because age is another factor to determine one's vision.. The older you get the more cloudy your vision.. Except some lucky people who never had to wear spectacle.. My case, I had started to wear glasses when I was form 2..long long time ago.

Now, I am  at home slowly recuperating but I was not lonely as almost every morning dropping by my brother's home for chatting and makan makan. Ohhh.. I really enjoy my retirement and have no regrets.

Till then. 

Wut

How much...

 

               From Google 

When my first daughter was still small, she could only count 1,2,3,4,5 and 6. So number six is the biggest number for her.. Meaning there is no more number after six.. Of course, later when she grows bigger she can count more.. And now she is a lawyer.. Properties and management is her expertise..

I talk about this because last time when I asked her.. Do you love Mommy.. She would answer.. Yes I do.. I replied how much do you love Mommy? Six.. She replied.. And we would laughed hard because for her that is the highest number ever. Six.

That was the joke my husband and me would remember and still use until today.. So I always asked my husband the same question.. And he would say., six.. 😂

Just now I asked Aurora the same question.. She answered bigger number.. 10. I asked only 10? Why not million? She said 10/10..perfect 10..Well the number improved from 6 to 10 for the youngest sibling.. 😂😂

My children.. For me all three of you are my happiness.. My son is my sun.. Without him, there is no living.. My daughter is my moon.. That shines softly upon my darkest nights .. And Aurora is the stars.. Millions of them uncountable..

And my husband is my universe.. I shall love you and uphold my love until the next world.

Wut

The words..

 It has been 5 years since I struggle hard to recite the holy words.. Al Quran Nur Kareem.. It started during Covid when I could go to office and needed to work from home..

One day, I was watching outside my front door and dreaming things.. When I heard my neighbour next door reciting Quran. I felt sad because my recitation was not as smooth as he's and I was jealous. Why can't I recite like her.

From that day onwards I recite every day.. Looking up You Tube to learn to pronoun the words correctly. I struggled hard but I make a point never to leave a da without recite at least few lines from Quran.

My eyes began to deteriorate so I installed apps in my phone so I can recite any time and anywhere.

Now after 5 years I can recite like my neighbour and spend any free time to recite even when taking a break during my morning walk.. Sitting at the park and recite. 

Al Quran is my food.. And my day is not complete without it. If I was nearly falling asleep, I jumped out of my bed and recite when suddenly remembered that I didnot recite that day.

The thing I am scared about is when I die I can't recite.. And I really hope the words get into my heart and stay there.. To be my friends and lit up my dark space inside the ground.. 

I now truly believe.. The closer you try to get near Allah, the much closer He gets to you.. Thank You Dear Allah for giving me the lights.. From the one who could not recite to the person who can't live without Your Words.. You Are The Most Kind and The Most Merciful..

Allhamdulillah.. 

Hospitalised..

                    From YouTube

All along my life, I have never been admitted in hospital wards  except for pregnancy cases or deliveries. Nevertheless, year 2025 broke my record.

Last Tuesday, Aurora had a school off so we went out late for breakfast. Early morning I had some fried bananas and  and later some mee hon soup. That afternoon I had some rice with a fried fish. Almost immediately I felt something was wrong. 

I vomited everything.. Non stop. My husband drove me to emergency. After drip I refused to be admitted and went home. The whole night I could not even keep a few sips of water in my tummy.. All out and by the next morning I was too weak and my husband had to carry me back to emergency. 

No choice I had be warded. Meaning the doctors were going to study me, my health history and all. Of course my diabetics would be the major drawback. 

3 days and 2 nights I had my holidays in the ward which was more like a nightmare. I could not move, I vomited and every inch of my two arms were jabbed for drip and insulin. I lost count how many times my blood was taken for tests. 

When the doctor came to my bed the third morning and broke the news that I would be discharged, it was the happiest moment in my life. 

Until now, I feel weak. Slowly my appetite came back and the vimitting completely stopped. Alhamdulillah.. Thank You Allah. 

To all the doctors ( young and handsome.. Woww).. nurses and even the cleaners.. Thank you so much. You are all great workers. 

To my dearest sister De, Jun..Abg  E.. Thank you for your care and love and food. And my husband and kids.. You are the reasons I want to home... Love

Wut

New Year 2025

 I feel so old.. And so grateful that I am still alive today. I had never thought I could manage to come to this new year.. Year 2025.

I am so grateful with so many things.. My life is blessed with so much happiness and contentment. I have everything and enough. 

Happy New Year all. 

        My beautiful children.. 

Wut