Kak Anim

Aurora is not feeling well. Her fever has been lasting for 4 days already. After she took medicine ( an almost impossible task ) her fever dropped a bit but not even 4 hours later it came back. I am worried what would happen if I have to go back to work on Tuesday, have to leave her with the father since I had taken a day off last Friday. So we went to a kampong 10 km away to seek help from a regular village midwife. She did some jampi and massaged Aurora's small stomach a bit. She said it was full of wind. True because Aurora does not eat well these last few days.

Later, we dropped by Kak Anim's house not far away from there. Just to visit her and to see if she is alright. She is renting a small shabby 1 room quaters behind the local mosque. The husband was  away working, and there were some of her daughters at home making kuih raya. Actually Kak Anim used to be my gardener in my old office but even after I transfered to my new workplace I keep on contact because she is very dear to me especially after Aurora was born. She was the first to hold Aurora after she was delivered. She has no blood connection with us  but she is closer to me more than my own siblings. She has been very kind to me, to my kids and be a loving and caring  opah to Aurora.

She is not well, having fever more than a week. Still, she has to work. At her age she is supposed to rest at home, not working hard like now. She even takes small wages building or renovating house after finish working in the afternoon, still continue working even until late at night. I pity her..she is an old lady but has a strong will and determination to bring up her children until all of them finish school and some go to university.
However, I think it is high time for her to let the children take care of her and not the other way round. Sometimes, it irritates me seeing the her children never stop depending money wise on her. They  are supposed to let her relax and do something for her in return of all her hard work. She really wants to have her own house..if only I have a lot of money, I will build one for her.

I didn't stay long during our visit. I bought some tempeyek from her and gave her some money for Hari Raya coming soon. She cried..I cried. That money is not much to be compared to her kindness to us. It worths more to me..

Money is important, however kindness is invaluable.


 

The twelve day..

My children

Aurora..aksi tengok tv lepas makan kenyang..perutnya..lattt..hehe

Aksi bermalas-malasan..amboi anak dara ni..relax sungguh..

 I started the day as usual. However, today was different. My heart was heavy thinking that today, both my son and daughter were sitting for SPM and PMR trial exams. Both exams started today. I was worried about Am..he is poor in Bahasa Melayu whereas Ayuni is struggling in Maths and Science. They are siblings but they are different in almost everything..Am is good in Maths and Science whereas Ayuni the opposite. Ayuni is good in languages while Am poor in BM but excellent in English. Sometimes I asked him "Were you born in England? " Apasal BM teruk sgt?" I felt like wanting to cry ( yeah..me ..the mother) every time I had to tutor him BM especially when doing essays. However his English is fluent..even I was suprised when sometimes he uttered bombastic English words.

In the office I prayed hard every time I thought about them. It was easier when I was sitting for tests or exams. I was not that nervous. Am called me the day before telling me that he was scared. I am scared more, I think. But the last words before he hang up I told him, " Am, do your best. I accept every thing as long as you had done the best. Mak sayang Am" He replied, "Am sayang mak jugak". There..it is enough. You have my blessing my son. Ayuni..I dropped her at the school gate..she hugged me and asked me to pray for her. Of course my daughter. Every night I perform the Hajat prayer for you both. Love does not come only in words. Love has to be shown..with actions. If I could give  this world to you my children, I would gladly give it. Even if I have nothing else for  my self, I wouldn't mind because you are my world..everything else is come second.

Please Allah..listen to my pray. Show them mercy, show them the way to success. Grant them happiness now and forever. Make them be great muslims and show them the correct path.

Amin.


 

Ramadhan al-Mubarak is coming...

I am so happy and very eager waiting for the month to come. So happy because Allah let me live until now and will be able to perform the fast tomorrow. I have heard 2 of my acquaintances had passed away just before the Ramadhan. When will my turn come? Thinking about that makes me worry. I still haven't done much getting ready to face Allah. So, I am really happy Ramadhan is here. I am thinking to make use all the time I have during this month to be close to Allah. I will take all the opportunities to ask for forgiveness from Him.

I took leave today. I spent most of my time sleeping because I have been working so hard last few weeks. I played with Aurora, cooked and slept again. Feel relived to be away from office.

To all..please forgive me if I have done any wrong to you. Lets begin the fasting month with clean starting so we can perform our duty to Allah better.


 

Crazy..

I did one crazy thing today..I took part in 4x100 run..at my age..with my cesarean tummy still raw..with my legs painful every time I walk..you are really crazy wut..

Well, we had our family day today. I was supposed to to be the VIP but then when they were looking for volunteer to complete a team...no one wants... to no avail, out of sudden I just simply put up my hand. I was surprised looking at myself volunteering. Are you crazy? Crazy I was, I was the third runner of my team and we finished third. Not bad..considering the fact that I was competing with the younger generation runners.

When I took my seat next to the other VIPs later, I thanked Allah. Lucky I didn't fall down. If it happens, that will be no end of my husband's "letering" ( what is the English word for this eh? ). I went home safe and sound..say nothing to him..hehehe.

That would be the last..I will never try this again. However, now I know I still can run away from the neighbour's dog if he choose to chase me next time..huhuhu

Till then..


 

My love is 21 months old...

This is the baby.."anak ayah". very close to her dad..sometimes I felt neglected. The way she clings to my hubby..kisses his hand, his face..really jealous!

Aurora Johanna..

She has spoken her first word..that is "mak"...yeaaaaa...I succeded. I won..she called me first rather than "ayah". Hehehe..it was a memorable one. Because of that winning, my husband owes me a treat. I am so happy.."anak ayah" alright..however deep inside I am still important to her. I was worried before because I have been busy with work..neglecting her a bit. I am sorry my love. I will make it up later.

Till then..


 

The Bomb...exploded!

Surely some of you think I was the one who exploded today..but no. Not me..not yet maybe. Maybe tomorrow because the people I have waiting for since yesterday still didn't turn up for work today, sending me sms, informing me that they are having fever. Fine..I am still having my littlest patience..let's see tomorrow then. I am not going to bombard them..just want to ask them why are they taking advantage?

Yes...the Bomb I meant up there was finally exploded in my old office. Finally almost half of my old colleagues put down their signatures in a memorandum to the district bis boss telling him that they couldn't stand anymore working under the boss's supervision. That they have had enough, that they have a lot of stress working with the boss, that they need some help to cool down the aggressive fire rumbling down every single heart and soul of them..well, almost all actually because a number of the staffs still in favour of the boss there..the kipas-mati fans la tu..

Unfortunately, since that they are all "mentimun" and the boss is the stinking durian..they were all condemned by the boss AND  the district big boss who not only refused to listen to them, the majority, but taking side..and being very very unfair. Unfair because some of the memos contained reports which could not be denied even by the big boss. And today, my phone ringing with various calls and sms by my friends..few of them received transfer letters very early in the morning. The transfer takes immediate effect. 24 hours dismissal. The boss used all the power and pulled all cables to transfer them, without any reasonable reason..the only reason is the boss hates them...the boss forgets that they also hate the boss..intensely.

I was very down by this but I could not do anything. What can I do? I am also powerless to fight my ex-boss. I could just lend my ears. So almost few hours they called me. Even though I was very busy with my own chores, I listened. I am their friend. I understand.

To all the big bosses out there, remember this. You are also humans with mistakes and errors and weaknesses. None of us are perfect. In your own organization you are the boss, people need to follow orders without any complains. Please administer them with some considerations and a lot of humanity. Please be humble because your people are doing work for you. Without them you are nothing. And believe me, one day when you are no longer a boss...you are meaningless. You just wait.

The end.


 

Pheww...another week to go..

Oh my..oh my..why should my boss  go for two weeks? It has become a burden to me..I feel like taking a long vacation..I really can't stand dealing and handling people. I feel like running away..I don't want to go to work. I dread myself waking up from sleep and get ready to work..Please..I become depressed thinking that I have to face these people at work..Hmmm..my God..please help.

Tomorrow I need to call several officers to come and see me. And they'd better come up with good excuses for behaving very unprofessionally and some are even acting like childish..playing hide and seek with me going searching for them all around the complex. My feet nearly killing me..and I was having a very difficult time catching up my breath. So, you'd better be prepared cause I will do something.

Finally, I understand why I don't want to the big boss. I am not having the patience a boss has to have.
Full stop. Dear Wut..let's retire soon if you still want to enjoy your gratuity and pension money..

This is my medicine..my chubby toddler

The end..