I am inviting trouble..

Yeah, right. I am looking for trouble and here it comes..good for me. It's getting worse..to the stage that I can sit quietly thinking and thinking..and dreaming that I can spend a day with...Oh my..what has happened to me???

Raya cookies..

My son called when I was cooking. He was asking if the father could buy him some hot dogs and to send them to his hostel. My husband quickly went out to buy them and with some lightening speed zoomed to the son's hostel..hmm. My husband..will do anything for the son..anything..

Tomorrow morning I will not rush anywhere. I had applied for a day off. Just want to stay at home to rest and to start my cookie's project. I want to bake some raya cookies..may be 2 or 3 types of cookies..that's it..not more than that. I don't have much time baking like last year. Now with the toddler I can hardly taking time baking.

Let's hope my plans worked or otherwise there is no homemade cookies this year..hehhe

10 months...my love

Aurora turns 10 months today. Such a sweet baby...smiles every time I say her name. She adores her dad, brother but mostly to her big sister, loves her so much. She can smile to her big sister even she is not in the mood and squeals happily even her big sister just smiles at her..

I adore her. I love her more when now she can differentiate me as her mother and others as strangers. She wants me to carry her not others. True, my hands feel like to drop carrying her because she is so heavy, but I love the smile she gives me every time she come into my arms. She is jealous every time me and her dad sit closely together..screams loudly as if she saying "don't get close to my dad..he is mine.." Hahahha..

My son came back yesterday. As to honour (hehehe) his return, I booked a table at a hotel for breakfasting. We went out around 5.30 pm and reached home around 10 p.m. However to me, the food was not as good as I had expected although the meal was quite expensive. It was not worth the money. Well, it was a good outing, so the not-so-delicious-food did not spoil the trip. We shopped for Aurora's dresses and I enjoyed shopping her outfits because girls' dresses are always pretty and cute.

As for today's breakfasting I cooked beef rendang for my son and few other side dishes. However, 10 minutes before the azan, then I remembered I didn't cook the rice. Oh my Goodness...So everybody ate something else before eating rice 20 minutes later..Hmm..how forgetful I was.

Thinking hard on..

This past few days I am thinking hard on my next move..moving out of here. I have been here nearly 4 months, still adjusting to the new environment, whereas I should have been comfortable already...but unfortunately I am not. I am not happy with the people..not happy with myself. I know I can't never change people..their perceptions..their thoughts of me (their new boss)..but the thing that troubles me is I, myself refuse to get near to them. I can't understand myself..my attitude towards people changed when I come here. In my old office I was a jovial person..I mixed with everyone right to the cleaning ladies..but somehow I can't..or better still..I don't want to do the same here. Why? I am asking myself too..why not? Am I still adjusting? Or have I changed? May be I am getting old so adjusting takes sometimes..longer time. I hope so because it creates unhappy surrounding for me and may be for them too.

That person is ignoring me altogether. May be he had come to his senses that its quite impossible liking me more than a colleague. Moreover the fact that I am somebody here brings him down to earth..the fact that hits me too and makes me sad..