Monday, November 29, 2010

"Rumah teres jer? Ingatkan...."

The above title of my entry tonight is actually an unfinished line uttered by one of my colleagues in the office. She was asking me the direction to my house. I was explaining to her about the house I just bought.. a terrace house located ten minutes drive form the small town I live now. Well..the above line was her respond. Her unfinished sentence is somehow lingers in my mind until today. And I feel downgraded just because I dont stay in a bungalow like them.

True.. I am not rich. I admit the salary I get every month is higher than them but they do not know I have loads of bills to settle..the first house loan, the second house loan,the car loan, house expenditures, giving money to my old father..children bla bla..Not even once I feel bad on spending money for my family.I know its my responsibilities.And I am not like them who like to show off their big cars, big bungalows, expensive is a fight among them to build the biggest house than others. Well..not can build 4 stories bungalow and see if I care..

My house is not just a small is a home where all I ever want in my life are inside.

Sunday, November 28, 2010

A man with a few words..

My son is 15 years old and now waiting anxiously for the PMR results to be released soon. He is always helping in the kitchen whenever I am cooking..washing plates, cutting the onions or just simply watching me and my daughter preparing dishes. He is the opposite of my talkative daughter who can speak nonstop for hours..until my ears nearly dropped..hehhe

Today,while he was watching me cooking, I tried to make him talk more..he is turning into a young man..and soon there will be another woman in his life..and I dont want to loose him.I said to him..I wish you will marry a lady who can cook well..He smiled and simply said..No I wont get married..I replied..Yer lah are in love yet. What he said next put tears in my eyes..Mak, you are the only woman..without you I cannot live..I was deeply touched by his words..and I cant believe he is so matured and could utter such beautiful lines.Yes..he speaks very little yet his little words are so wonderful and amazed me sometimes.He is truly my son..the sun in my life..

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Happy Birthday My Love...

Picture from Google

From inside my car I saw a tall and lanky man walking towards me..he had long straight hair that brushed his back..thin and hollow eyes..My heart skipped a beat..he was finally here..he looked different from the photo he sent me..Yes..he was my date and that was the first impression I had on him...hmm..not actually my taste..hehe..but I have loved him long before we actually met..

After that it was all history..we finally got married even some of his family members were strongly against it. I managed to fill up his stomach and make him gained some flesh to hide the skinny bones of his, to force him to cut the long hair short and cleared the acnes on his face..but failed to make him stop smoking ( I am still trying). Another failure is I still cant get a decent and satisfying answer from him to my question...why do u love me? He keeps on giving the same answer even I tricked him many times.The answer is... because I love him. The reason I asked him the boring question is because until now I cant understand why a bachelor, a quite good looking young (younger than me) man who could get a more beautiful and single girl to marry, could fall in love with me. I was a single mother, with two young kids, not so beautiful face..older than him..when he proposed I cried of disbelieved and thanked Allah for finally granted me a man who loved me the way I am and wanted me to share his life...

He is not rich..we just managed to live comfortably but he loves my kids and shows it in every possible way he can. He touched my heart many times when put the children first everytime..he is a better father to my children more than the real father..and I think due to his kindness to me and my children, The Almighty finally granted him with a baby of his own who is two months old already. It was for me a miracle because I had two miscarriages before this baby was born..

My love..a long entry about you but still not enough for me to say all ... I do love you so much and everyday I thank Allah for this happiness..for making you my husband and I want to stay being your wife even in the next world..

Hand in hands we have travelled

in all the seven continents of this earth

but none as wide

as my love for you

Together we have voyaged

on all the seven oceans

but none as deep

as my love for you..Bius..

Friday, November 26, 2010

To do or not to do...

Aurora and her dad..

It has been a busy week.. many visitors came to my humble home..many things happened..many stories (gossips) exchanged and now a decision to make..that is to do (follow order from the new boss) or ignore the order (can I?)...sigh..
I despise myself being a middle person..
My boss is not quite happy with 2 couples (husband and wife) working in the same building. So my boss asked me to make a written report to be presented to the headquaters about the two problematic couples. As a boss of course that is an order for me but I trully hope that this matter does have to go straight to the HQ. I think my boss should monitor the two couples first rather than making a drastic move to misjudge them or to transfer them away. And I know my boss surely have listened to other source of info whom dislike the couples and wanted them to go away from this office.
What should I do? As a subordinate I should follow orders..but as a person I do hope there is another solution to this..I keep thinking what if I was the one targeted?

I will have to do some shopping buy something for my lover boy..soon it will be his birthday..what to buy? And what to cook for the nite special dinner? Hmm..

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Human..the most exasperating creature

I always overlooked my instinct..ignored it many times..but everytime it proved to me that instinct is always correct..

I set a "date' with my old boss to settle some unfinished business. I felt uneasy having a date with him so I called a friend to keep me company..but later spent last many hours contemplating my actions since I didnot feel good about that..I have always admire my boss but no more than that and certainly would never want wrong interpretation from others..

So today I was hoping all went meeting with him was solely about business..but some stupid creatures turned it into juicy gossip..I hate people who keep on stabbing other people backs..always finding faults of others and always looking for a cold war...? Why keep on having negative attitude? Life is short..enjoy it. Since I got pregnant and now delivered Aurora I always avoided talking bad about others..just want to enjoy life...others seem unimportant already.Even now when I nearly reached the peak of my career but it seems meaningless compared to my happiness with my newly found joy...

If I have a lot of money or marry a rich man..I would have stopped working a long time ago..but then it is only a wish..

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Horayyy...I am free!

My love..Aurora

Finish my confinement last Sunday..and start cooking all fav dishes all over again. My mother passed away 10 years ago (this Aidil Adha marks her ten years...she passed away performing Hajj) eldest sister taking care of my nieces away in mother in law is too old to take care of finally I take care of my baby and myself during confinement..yes..sad..but that's life..

Had a mild (hehehe) fight with my lover boy..I felt he did not show enough concern and care enough during my confinement...well..he still managed going out with his friends and leaving me alone taking care of my baby..haishh..manyak hensem..

But frankly speaking he is forever like that..does not really show love..moreover being romantic..jauh sekali..but I know he loves me..he shows it in his own way..

My baby...7 weeks old...and still unpredictable sleeping time..hope by the time I start working again that will change...

Talking about going to work again..I have a new boss..a lady....hadaoiii la