Tuesday, September 25, 2012


Yesterday I had one of the most chaotic day at work. Luckily there were many people helped me to get things straight up. At the end of the day, all problems were taken care off but one. This 'perasan' person who always creates problems and spreads gossips. I had the urge to see this 'exasperating person' and bash her up. The only thing that stopped me was the thought that I was the most senior people around. I have to control my anger and my act. My boss is not around for a week so I have to take charge. I don't to create more havoc especially when my boss is not around.

I returned home with unhappy feelings. I was home late but still I managed to coak my husband to bring me and the children out. My head nearly burst with so many bees humming inside my brain. Late afternoon we went out. Just to wonder around the supermarket, ate, bought some t-shirts for Aurora, some veges and then we went home. Such a simple outing but at least my mind was clear. Before going to sleep, I vowed to take a day off the next day.

However, I still woke up around 5 a.m and cooked. And I still go to work.

And here I am in the office..scribble something.

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Closing the final chapter..

I am in deep thought. Since I received this sms last week. Somebody wants to buy my old house in Kuantan. I was surprised on how could she get my number. I have changed my phone number a countless times since I moved out from Kuantan. My mood of the day suddenly went sombre because the house symbolizes the  memories of my old and sad life..more than a  decade ago. The memories which I have managed to put behind my subconscious thought..the time that I wish I have never had. Unfortunately, I had.

The person asked if she could buy the property. She is apparently my neighbour's sister there. I apologized for I have abandoned the house for so long thus creates a lot of problem by leaving the unattended 'small jungle' in the neighbourhood. I asked for some time to think and to discuss with my hubby of the offer. Now I am still thinking.

I am sure of not going back there. I had the worst time of my life in the the town. I cringed the last time we went there..driving down the road and saw the crumbled house. I have started a new life here and I don't ever want to go back there. I had enough.

I have discussed with my boy since I would name the house after him. He too didn't want to stay there. The house was bought with my own money..and I am still paying near RM 1000.00 every month...for nothing. Never in my mind the idea of  leaving the house out of sudden..leaving all my furniture there..with only some possessions I moved to here. All because of the menace of one ex. The house has become my liability..and my source of many years of pain and suffering. I have to let it go.

Now, I have finally opened my heart to finally closing the sad chapter of my life. I have started afresh and I am happy now. Let's cut the last string that connects me with my ex-husband. We  have our own ways now..and I believe that sad chapter of my life has come to the end.

Good bye house..


Sunday, September 9, 2012

A late entry..My Love is 23 months!

My anak teruna and anak dara

My love..

On the way beraya..

The sisters..I think the younger sister will grow taller than the older sister..
Smiling..showing her teeth..near complete set

It has been more than a month I abandon my blog. Besides being so busy with life, with my family, work, with health problems..I just simply had no mood to write. Every day I tried my best to finish the house chores or sometimes baking projects..then without wasting much more time I quickly jump to bed. I wake up early every day so I need at least 5 hours undisturbed sleep. Aurora sleeps regularly at 10 p.m. I take the opportunity to sleep too. However if she does not sleep during the day time, she falls asleep earlier..around 8.30 p.m. It is better for me but the house would be quiet without her chatters. And finally I can watch other programme on tv..if she is around the tv would tune in to baby tv of disney I can memorize all the songs there..

      She eats a lot..getting heavier and taller. She eats any thing and every thing but not spicy thing of course. Once I tried to put in her rice a little bit of curry gravy..just to taste. She ate the rice a little, later refused. I just want her to be more adventurous in her diet..not like her dad. Very choosy. She still drinks her milk as usual. I am glad with that because some toddlers refuse milk after they take solid. I will try with some other food and see the reactions. She rarely falls sick, fever or flu. Her skin is so smooth and soft. Her cheeks turn red on hot day and I love to see that.

      She thinks her dad is hers alone. I cannot share her dad. She loves me, yes, but her dad is totally hers. Every time she sees me putting my head on my husband's shoulder, she would quickly making unhappy sound and immediately comes and pushes my head away..or my hand away from her dad. are so jealous..but I love you so much so I don't mind that. If it is other woman..that's another story.

     My two older children had sat for their trial exams. Ayuni got 5 As and 3 Bs...Bs for English (English?..what??), History and Islamic Knowledge ( what?? Islamic Knowledge). Hmm..she has to study harder then rather than looking at me typing my entry now...smiling yer..exam dah dekat..bila nyer nak study dik oi.. Idham also got his result..6 As and 1 B and 2 Cs...Cs? Yup, C for Chemist and Add Maths and B for Biology.. My son..please study harder..both of you. I just pray to Allah that they will score all As in the real exams...Insyaallah..

    Till then..

p/s  Hi LW and are both of you..Selamat Hari Raya, maaf zahir batin..