In a few weeks Aurora will be 10 years old. Such a long time but it is a worthwhile journey. And this blog will celebrate it's 10 years being written as I dedicated this blog for her, my love.
I started this blog few days before I delivered her, my bundle of joy, who is now a tall, a very beautiful shy young girl as she has held my heart since the day I saw her in the baby cot. I walked from one baby to another to check the collar on the babies's leg to find one that matched mine. I needed to collect her for home after I was discharged from the maternity ward an hour before. Of all the babies in the ward, she was the biggest with a pair of small eyes, more like a Chinese. When I saw her the first time, immediately I could felt warm in my heart. Here was my baby that I had carried in my womb more than nine months..took hundreds and hundreds of insulin injections for diabetes..warded and discharged from the hospital countless time, prayed every single day for her to be healthy..I had suffered so much and now here was she in my arms and I fell in love with her right there and then.
I had a very difficult and long Caesarean delivery and I lost a lot of blood. I could not walk as usual but since I was the only person allowed to collect her from the ward so slowly and painfully I changed her clothes, put her baby socks and carried her in my arm carefully, took the lift to the ground floor where Kak Anim waited patiently. She took my baby from my arms as I was about to faint. I could feel blood gushed out and I nearly fell there if not she quickly braced my self. We walked to the car, and that 50 metres walk was the longest I felt in my life.
And now, she is almost 10 years old and her Mommy has wandered too far from her original intention of writing this blog. I had wished to leave her this blog when one day I will be gone but too many personal things I had posted here to make it impossible.
This blog was my 10 years journey of experience, my monologues, my memories, my happiness and many of my sadness. I had jotted down events that are important, people who are dear and had touched my heart, happy moments with my family and sadness which understood only by few. I am not writing for people to read and to understand me, more like I am writing as to talk to my self because there were many entries that were understood my me alone. Sometimes when I read an old entry and checked whether my feeling at that moment and at present were the same but sometimes it was not.
I wrote about people around me and each had spent some part of their life teaching me...and I really appreciate the lesson they had taught me whether they notice it or not. They were only few characters I had managed to write but there are more. And of course there were more important events to write but I could not write them down because those were too sensitives or too personal.
So Happy Birthday blog..All Along the Way..and if one day I stop writing, it is not because I hate writing any more but because I could not write..
This is me Wuthering Height...
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