Year end.. New year

There are two ways of looking at things at the moment. One, is to count the days left in the current year 2022 and two, by counting few days left before entering the new year, 2023.

I choose number one. 

I feel the urgency of finishing few more tasks of my life in these few days. I feel running out of time with these unfinished businesses. Tasks of my personal achivements.. Which till today are halfway done.

I am not looking foward for the new year. For me, new year comes with new responsibilities. Even though I am not working anymore, my personal tasks are the same. Aurora will soon going to secondary school.. She needs to be more serious of her studies which means I have to be more serious to make sure she studies.. Such a never ending job for me..

I am getting older.. My strength has left me.. Waking up fresh is a rare occasion with most of the time I feel weak and helpless. I spend more time on bed.. Doing many things on bed.. Which making me decided to change mattress and bed frame too.

I tend to be lonely..I am lazy to go out andbe sociable. However I keep contact with few close friends and starting go dating.. Once in Ipoh taking ets.. One dating my old school friend in Kota Warisan recently. I am happy with this few dates. 

Till then. Happy New Year 2023 every body. 

May our lives  be blessed with health and contentment by Allah..

Awi

                

                                      Ju

Wut

Godaan Rindu..

Datang kenangan mengganggu di hati

Mengenang malang harapannya jiwa..

... Gelisah hati penuhlah kecewa..

Puas aku cuba nak melupakan

Tapi wajahmu terbayang dalam kenangan

Sungguh siksa ya godaannya rindu

Jika berpisah hati ku terharu

Kau jauh pandangan bila ku kenangkan

Rindu ganggu perasaan... 

                            Credit You Tube

Wut.. 

Congratulations Anduk.. My girl

                             Anduk.. 

 I seldom talk about my girl.. Anduk. I keep her exclusive because she is so precious for us. However, today marks her special day.. Her graduation day after years of hard work in her studies.

Anduk.. We are proud of you my girl. You have a strong heart, a very loving and gentle lady but an ambitious person and very adamant in persuing her target.

And, today you deserve every single respect and happiness because you have reached the day to hold the degree in your hands. 

Congratulations my girl, my petite smart lawyer!

Wut. 

Raining..

                          From You Tube

It rains almost every day here. When it rains I tend to be melancholic. I enjoy listening to the splatters of the rain water coming down to the roof.. Looking at the water drops directly from the sky. Sitting alone at the kitchen and staring aimlessly through the window glass panes and think.. Remembering...

Such a simple activity but gives a lot of meanings to me.. Nowadays, I prefer to be alone.. If not in my bedroom, my next favorite place is the kitchen. Sometimes Jacob sits to accompany me there.. He too likes looking out..for any other cat passes by or any other movements by the stray dogs.. And later asking some snack from me.. 😍

Raining brings a lot of memories.. Happy times and sad moments.. It is like a silent movie when all the events in my life came across my mind with each of the rain drops. Such a long twisted movie.. Ages and ages of  old pictures came splashing in front of my eyes that I feel that I have lived too long.. 

I remember the time I was little in Pahang.. Playing in the rain with my siblings, the time I was schooling.. The cold water drops on my face when I missed my bus in my university life.. Walking back to college.. Until the small water drops on my body with cold wind blowing as I sat reciting Yassin on my father's grave last week in Johor.. 

I know it will rain on the day I die.. 

Wut

Rindu..

 

                               From Youtube 

Wut

Am is home.. And home is chaos.. 🤔

 Am returned to Malaysia in August 11..So we picked him up at KLIA and brought him to a homestay that I rented in Kampung Baru KL.  Ayuni finished working on Friday 12 August and joined us there.

He picked up his convo robe and mortar and the next day on August 13, Am had his degree convocation in PWTC.  He was happy and content..

And all the days started from the day my husband drove to KLIA until Sunday when we came back home,  I was sick.  Fever, flu and coughing.. Could not wait to go back to Tapah so I could go to clinic to get medicine.. KL is a big city but I could not get the suitable medicine for me.. Truly a kampong woman I am..

So came back to a house with dust and hammers knocking down the walls.. Drills to break the tiles.. House with no kitchen.. All these bring headache.. Luckily my flu and cough are gone.. 

I stayed almost 24 hours in my room amid the drilling sounds and the dust.. My husband doing his best to mop and cleans the dust every time the workers finish their chores in the afternoon.. 

He and Am did their wonder to install a small kitchen area in my living room so I can cook simple dishes on my induction stove coz I could no more take outside food.. I had enough. 

Another 2 weeks to go so I could get my kitchen back with better utilities and bigger space.. 

Until then.. 

Am is home.. 

We are so proud of you.. My son

The family.. 

Wut. 

I can't sleep..

I am worried about something.. Tossing and turning still could not sleep..

I know I could do nothing except praying that the problem will be solved. I know everything depends on Allah Grace.. 

More than a month ago we visited Am in Netherlands. He was fine and was free all the time we were there. It was very lucky for us since he had been our tour guide during our stay there. He bought our train tickets using his card, so we moved around easily.

Netherlands is very clean.. The air is crisp and cold.. No pollution what so ever.. Clean and well kept. It was summer but the climate was around 10 to 12 degree. I was freezing and always wore three layers of clothes.

We went from top, the city Alkmaar, where our rented house was located, to the south city like Den Hague and Rotterdam. We also went to Brussels, Belgium for one day trip. 

We stayed one night in Am's room in Delft, walked around Amsterdam and had boat trips. It was nice but I missed Malaysia. I missed surau everywhere in my country where I could stop any time to pray.. I missed our food too.. 

I will continue my experience there in next entry.. 

                      Boat trip.. Amsterdam 

                                 Brussels

                   Flower Garden in Brussels

                      Night sun.. 9 pm

                  Water everywhere.. Delft

           

                          In front of Am's uni

Am

Till then... 

Wut

A trip..

I have been going 
around the country since I retired. However this coming trip will be the first going overseas.

We are flying to Netherlands within this   few days to visit Am..after almost a year not seeing him. I really miss him even we are texting each other every day and have a video call at least once a week.

Anduk can't go together and I am sad she will miss this trip. Of course she could not take 8 days off from her firm and she is desperately wants to finish her chambering soon. She cannot afford to have a delay as she targeted to end this chambering in August.

Anduk is turning 25 this June 4, and we will miss her birthday. However, I bought her a present and we had a short trip to Malacca, Muar and Mount Ophir last week. I could see she was happy and content.

So Netherlands, here we come..

Wut

I am free..

Nearly 6 months I have been free..

I did not feel I am missing my job.. Nor missing the office..

I am enjoying my freedom to the fullest.. Nothing to talk about  to my  co workers.. No gossiping.. No hastle of driving here and there.. And the best thing is.. No boss ordering me around..

I spent most of my time on my own.. Wake up early.. No rushing to prepare to go to work.. I take my time praying.. Reciting Quran.. Eating and driving around Tapah with my husband.. And sleeping.. 

Finally.. I cut the string! 

Thank You Allah.. 

Wut

Happy Birthday.. Am

Eventhough Am would have never read my blog but to note down my birthday wishes to him here..

Happy Birthday dear son.. We love you and we miss you so much.. 

May Allah bestow upon you health, happiness and success..in this world and after life.. 

Thank your for healing me.. Taking care of me.. Making me a proud mom.. 

We will wait for you to come back.. 

Wut