New Year..2012

Every new year eve I will always remember the night,the time,the moment I celebrated the year 2000 alone...twelve years ago. It is a long time ago..but to me it had only happened yesterday. The year 2000..it was quite a talked-about new year because the world changed to the new millennium..the number 2 took over number 1..2000 after 1999. At that time I was in Kuantan..left alone with two small kids.. while he was running after a new love. Well..it was a sad time of my life and now after 12 years I had never expected that I too could be happy and content like I had wished for that miserable night.

On the second day of this new year we woke up late. Immediately I went to the kitchen to start cooking nasi lemak. Idham is going back to the hostel a day earlier than the rest of his friends because he wants to help his teacher in the co-op. And now..after he has gone I feel lonely and missing him a lot. When he is at home he seldom talk..he likes watching TV or playing games but the fact that he is at home comforts me. His presence is enough..but now he is gone. That's why I feel awkward. I miss him until my husband notice and willingly drives me around the town..around his hostel...at 10.30 p.m ( which he rarely willing to do) ..to ease my pain. Oh dear..I can't imagine if he is gone further away from me..I will be broken down with sadness. Sigh..

My children...now I think I need all of you more than ever..